In most of the chapters, I use the masculine “he” or “him” to describe a mourner. This was done to make the flow of the text easier for the reader, but all Shiva laws and customs apply equally
to men and women unless specifically indicated in the book.
There are many to acknowledge and thank for their part in making this book a reality. Dr. Marc Singer is more than a friend. He is like a brother to me and has been with me every step of the way of this process. He was instrumental in conceiving and developing the idea for this book. Marc and I went through our respective Shivas together and took our experiences and invested them in this project. I am deeply grateful for his support and encouragement and I am proud that we achieved our goal of publishing this book. Thanks Doc, for everything.
My personal impetus for writing this book was the recent passing of both my father, Rabbi Zev Segal, z”l and my brother, Moshe Segal, z”l. My mother, Mrs. Esther Segal, who should live until 120 years, has been the epitome of strength in dealing with these two tragedies in her life, and as I have always done, I try to emulate her grace and ability to cope with difficult circumstances. I thank her for everything she has done to bring this book to print and I wish
her only continued nachas from her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Editing a book is a difficult task and I thank Chava Willig Levy for her ability to transform a sentence while keeping the voice of the author intact. My years of work in the Jewish Literacy Foundation with my friend and partner, Shimon Apisdorf, allowed me a bird’s eye view of how a real author writes. I thank him for all his help on this project.
Jeremy Staiman did a masterful job of typesetting this book and I thank him for his efforts and his friendship. Ben Gasner’s cover design captured the essence of what we wanted to convey and I appreciate the opportunity to benefit from his great talent and expertise. I also want to thank Shloime Ash for suggesting the title of the book.
I also want to thank the following people for their assistance in this project: Baruch Cohen, Rabbi Hillel David, Ari Goldman, Rabbi Ephraim Greenblatt, Rabbi Paysach Krohn, Rabbi Yosef Zvi
Rimon, Rabbi Dovid Solomon, Chaim Spero and Rabbi Dr. Tzvi Hersh Weinreb.
I could not have written this without the encouragement of my brother, Nachum Segal. I thank him for everything, especially for being a friend.
We recently lost my wife’s grandfather, Phillip Grossman, z”l, who was a major part of our lives. We wish Dorothy “Grandma” Grossman many years of good health and Yiddishe nachas from her family in her new home in Jerusalem.
G-d has blessed us with a beautiful family and each one of our children has a special part in helping me with everything I try to accomplish. Chani, Akiva, Yosef, Neemi, Zviki, Yehuda, Yedidya Zev and Matanya: I love you all very much and thank Hashem for you every day. May you continue to grow and be the best that you can be!
Finally, I want to thank my wife, Rivki. She is a constant inspiration to me and her influence is present on every page of this book. Baruch Hashem, we have merited to live with our family in
Jerusalem for the last seven years. May G-d give us the strength and insight to continue to do our part in whatever master plan He has for us.
Yigal Segal
Jerusalem, 2012
Yigal Segal
www.guidetoshiva.com
(O) 212-444-1814
FAX 212-898-0176
US Cell - 646-808-0456
Israel Cell- 052-668-4645
